In 2015, pictures surfaced of Oscar winning writer/director/act Ben Affleck’s new back tattoo. The shirtless pictures taken on the beach during a filming shoot shows a colorful phoenix tattoo that appeared to be flying out of his shorts. Whilst the color inking is well executed but it’s so large and so saturated in heavy yellow, blue and red ink. It also appears to be covering the actor’s previous shoulder tattoo. We’re not sure we want to see. It was first thought to be fake, but unfortunately it appeared to be a post-divorce inking. Jennifer Lopez, who was his ex-fiancée, has declared it as “Awful.” Jennifer Garner, his ex-wife, commented, “Am I the ashes in this scenario? I take umbrage. I refuse to be the ashes.” Luckily it’s on his back so we wont have to see it too much.
Rapper Drake went all the way to Sweden to get a tattoo of a bottle of cologne. He inked a very saturated black tattoo of the men’s fragrance Drakkar Noir on his shoulder. Whilst the tattoo is well executed and is well saturated in dark ink, it’s just a totally bizarre concept, especially when placed next to the far cooler blazing skull. Diehard fans will remember that his original Twitter handle was @drakkardnoir, more recent fans will this is just plain weird. We’re not sure which is worse, getting a very heavily shaded tattoo of a cologne bottle, or being inspired by an old Twitter handle when choosing a tattoo?
3. Jackson Rathbone
Twilight actor Jackson Rathbone is such a condiment enthusiast, he has a giant tattoo of a Heinz Ketchup bottle on his thigh. The actor told TV host Wendy Williams that his family made fun of his obsession with the tomato sauce, so he decided to have it tattooed on him for life. Not only is it a random choice of design, the bottle is badly shaded with wobbly lines and patchy red coloring. Ed Sheeran also has a Heinz Ketchup related inking, but more about him next.
4. Ed Sheeran
As well as being a hugely successful singer-songwriter, Ed Sheeran has earned headlines for his large and sometimes questionable collection of tattoos. In 2015 he debuted the large color portrait of a lion on his chest. Many were convinced (and hoped) it was fake, but it was later confirmed to be real. Sheeran’s lion was intended to be a tribute to his home country (the animal is the symbol of his native England). The tattoo, randomly placed in the center of his chest, is very well designed with smooth lines and a realistic portrait design. The problem is, it’s such a big focal point to his contrasting pale skin and doesn’t fit in with his much more delicate collection of sleeve tattoos. Perhaps this would have been better suited to the leg or the side of his body, unlike the chest where it just doesn’t look right.
5. Cheryl Cole
Popstar and former Girls Aloud member Cheryl (previously known under her maiden name of Cheryl Cole) sat under the needle for 15 hours for this rose tattoo. To symbolize her survival against malaria, she chose to tattoo her favorite flower, a rose, on her lower back and bum. The large color saturated tattoo wasn’t generally popular when it debuted online. Whilst it’s beautifully done by a clearly talented artist, it’s just too much. From a distance the inking is so dark it’s hard to make out what it is, all the colours blur into one and loses any definition. Cheryl is such a small woman and this large tattoo that runs from her thighs to the middle of her back, is far too big her body type. We also hate to think what this will look like in a decade or so.
6. Cara Delevingne
The actress and model, Cara Delevingne, took her love for bacon too far when she got it tattooed on the sole of her feet. The writing tattoo is inked in large capital letters and in an unusual shade of maroon. Luckily this ode to her favorite cured meat is not often out on display, and we can’t help but wonder how wrinkle and faded it must now look. Of all the beautifully words in the world, choosing this one plus the ellipsis seems like a strange choice.
7. Ariana Grande
The ‘No Tears Left To Cry’ singer attempted to get the title of her hit track ‘7 Rings’ tattooed on her hand in Japanese. Unfortunately, according to Japanese Twitter users, her tattoo actually means barbecue grill or charcoal grill. Grande later tried to update the ink, but made it worse by adding the Japanese symbol to the wrong spot. Now her artwork reads Japanese BBQ finger. With the placement on the hand, it will be hard to hide this fail. This is why you don’t get a tattoo in a language you don’t speak, no matter how cute it may look.
Rapper T-Pain must really really like Facebook. In 2011 T-Pain had the Facebook Like logo inked onto his arm, with the l (and grammatically incorrect) quote of “You dont have to like me.” He joked on Twitter, where he debuted the inking, “I think this ones pretty sweet, unless facebook shuts down soon 0_o.” Whilst Facebook hasn’t shut down, it has had its fair share of controversies and certainly isn’t as popular as it once was. We’re not sure this one will age well, and we don’t mean fading. Let’s hope he didn’t have the Myspace logo tattoo on him as well.
9. Zosia Mamet
The Girls actress chose to get a giant heart tattooed on the palm of her hand. It’s a simple line drawing, reminiscent of the kind of drawings you did on your hand in Biro when bored in the back of class. She knew she wanted to get a heart tattoo but thought “it would look cheesy,” so instead decided to place the ink painfully on her palm. “And I like the sentiment that when you shake someone’s hand it’s with your heart,” she said. Over time, and with all the hand washing we are now doing, this now probably looks like a grey smudge.
10. Gucci Mane
Rapper Gucci Mane, shortly after being released from a chemical dependency treatment facility, chose to tattoo a triple scoop ice cream cone plus some red lightning bolts tattooed on his cheek. The tattoo is not only badly placed across his face, ranging from his eyebrow to the side of his mouth, it looks like it was inked by an amateur. The additional ‘Brrr’ inscribed on the cone inking just makes it worse, and the colour highlights and lack of shading show he didn’t visit an expert tattoist. According to a spokesperson for the rapper, the tattoo is a “reminder to fans of how he chooses to live his life. Cool as ice.” Just not copy how he choose his tattoos.
11. Hayden Panettiere
Heroes and Nashville actress Hayden Panettiere’s tattoo was supposed to say ‘vivere senza rimipianti,’ which means “live without regrets” in Italian. Unfortunately, she may regret that she spelled the last word wrong as it should be ‘rimpianti.’ The actress has since had the ribcage italic tattoo removed and has joked about the irony of regretting that specific tattoo.
12. Amanda Seyfried
Mean Girls actress Amanda Seyfried has the word ‘minge’ tattooed in pretty italics on her foot after filming Mamma Mia! The word was often said by her co-star Colin Firth, although we hate to think it what context. Unfortunately, the word is commonly used to describe a woman’s private parts in British slang and isn’t favored by many. I suppose it could be worse a slang for a woman’s anatomy…
13. David Beckham
The heavily tattooed British footballer decided to get the name of his wife Victoria tattooed on his inner arm in Hindi script. While his intentions were romantic and the tattoo is attractive enough, the tattoo misspelt her wife’s name and refers to her as Vihctoria.
14. Jennifer Lawrence
The Oscar-winning actress chose to tattoo the chemical symbol for water on her hand since she’s “always going to need to be hydrated.” She later admitted she was jumping on the tattoo train and only had one because everyone else did. However, the 2 in H20 should be in subscript, or lower than the HO lettering, Lawrence has the H above the O. “I should have Googled it before I got it tattooed on my body forever,” she joked. Even if you take out the incorrect science, the little inking is in a fading red shade that looks like she has written on her hand on pen. We’re getting cheating in high school exam flashbacks.
15. Kat Von D
As a tattoo artist, you’d think Kat Von D would know better than to get a portrait of a lover. The Miami Ink star got her then-fiancé Jesse James’ fifth-grade school photo inked underneath her armpit. The creepy picture of the child was meant to be a romantic surprise, although he thought she was “crazy,” when she revealed it. Although it is clearly done by a talented portrait artist, the whole idea of having a smiling child from the 1970s inked on your side is just weird. The couple broke up shortly afterwards, and she had it removed. As a portrait artist herself, you think she’d know that tattooing a lover is a bad omen.
16. Nicole Richie
When reality star Nicole Richie was 16, she got the word ‘virgin’ inked on her wrist, not as a sexual thing but purely astrological as she’s a Virgo. She has since called it “embarrassing and desperate.” Although it’s a small and rather common wrist replacement, the curly font and blue star replacing the dot of the i is just tacky. This would be bad enough as a wild teen, but now as a mother two it’s especially cringe-worthy.
17. Steve 0
The Jackass star has over 30 tattoos, but his self-portrait is definitely the weirdest and the most self-indulgent. The huge picture of his face giving the thumbs takes up a large portion of his back, alongside the words “Yeah dude, I rock!”, and his own signature underneath. The inking looks pretty amazing, it’s a decent likeness but the size and placement of it is just ridiculous. The additional signature is a choice, maybe it’s to help in case he forgets his own named. The stuntman has since declared his regret, but it’s probably not the stupidest thing he’s ever done.
18. Chris Brown
Not long after Chris Brown was released from jail he got a tattoo of a woman that looks beaten and bruised. Brown, who was arrested for assaulting Rihanna, had to confirm that the neck tattoo was a Mexican sugar skull and not a reference to his former girlfriend. Aside from the unfortunate likeness to his ex, it looks like a messy face chart used by a make up artist, with the sugar skull detail making him look like he’s suffered from burns to his neck.
19. Zac Efron
In 2011, the term YOLO was only coming into popularity thanks to the Drake song. The acronym for ‘You Only Live Once’ went quickly from being popular to mocked. High School Musical actor Zac Efron decided to remind himself that he only lived once by tattooing it onto his hand. Efron has since removed the tattoo, but we’ll all still remember the embarrassing early 2010s motto.
20. Kelly Osbourne
Daughter to hellraiser Ozzy Osbourne isn’t shy of the tattoo needle. Her tattoo collection is generally well designed and well thought out, but this wonky and scratchy musical instrument is the odd one out. She drunkenly decided to get a keyboard tattooed on her arm, something she regretted immediately. The keyboard is too small and strangely place on the outside of her arm, with one strip of green. She told Access Hollywood she’s not sure why she chose that specific musical instrument “I can’t play the piano. And I have a keyboard because I liked Moogs [synthesizers] because I went through my weird 80s phase…Even though it’s really beautifully done and it’s cool, it has absolutely no relevance to me and it’s stupid.” It’s no surprise she has recently decided to remove it, the design getting less clearer with age.